Fear

For the last 5 weeks I have wanted to go back to LHC but to be honest with you I am scared to death. I don't mean a little sick I mean the full blown thing Headache, sick to my stomach, weak, can't catch my breath, chest hurt, just down right BLAH. I have no idea why, I talked to my therapist about this she told me that she honestly thinks I am having an anxiety attack about going into someplace that I am not sure if I am welcomed. Now to the reason I feel this way I had sent out an email to help keep our fire departments the way that they are, after that email I was taking off the church's email list. I don't know if this has any link to it or not. When I see Pastor Aron he is as nice as can be but my heart feels like it is going to pound out of my chest I get so nervous and have no idea why.

I pray daily about this, take my medication, and I still can't get over this fear. I think I am going to try again Sunday if I can get my nerve up and go. I just hope my back seat is not taken because I will have to have A LOT of power to go any further.